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 | Greg White (44/M) | |
| Rolando Garza (25/M) | |
| Rodriguez Madaris (31/M) | |
| Frederick Hawthorne (30/M) | |
| Michael Weibel (53/M) | |
| Misty Dawn Anderson (26/F) | |
| James Resop (37/M) | |
| Alan Sturm (25/M) | |
| Jerry Hamilton (32/M) | |
| Deanna Johnson (21/F) |
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52 / Male Los Angeles, CA Steven C. James #046150 Po Box 3400-3H45 ASPC E. Browning Florence, AZ 85132 in the act of attacking a 14 year old boy. Now he sits on Death Row awaiting execution... (By request, names have been replaced with initials.) JM: Child molester MN: The teenage boy that was propositioned LL: Accomplice to Steven James On Nov. 16, 1981, JM picked up 14-year-old MN and made homosexual advances towards him. MN rebuffed JM, but suggested that he might find a more hospitable reception in a trailer belonging to Steven James. When JM followed MN into the trailer, James, another man -- LL, and MN took turns beating him. The three then forced JM into the back seat of his own car and drove toward Salome, where James’ parents owned some property with an abandoned mine shaft on it. En route, a police officer stopped them but LL threatened to kill JM if he attempted to draw the officer’s attention. After arriving at the Salome property around dawn, James ordered JM to step up to the mine shaft. As JM pleaded for his life, James fired directly at him from a distance of less than five feet. JM charged James and tried to get the gun, so LL and MN began striking JM with large rocks and a board. After JM fell to the ground, they fired point blank at him three more times. Nothing came out of the pistol because the barrel was fouled with debris. They then dragged JM to the mine shaft and threw him in, dropping rocks and railroad ties on top of him. MN pleaded to several charges as a juvenile and testified against LL and James. God's Commission to All My whole life before prison, friends of my "Family" told them I would never amount to anything; and of course, my "Family" passed these words on to me. When you hear something from "Family" enough times, it begins to sink in. Being brought up in a Baptist Church, I had to memorize much scripture. I didn't believe most, if any, of it because it was being forced on me. So, of course I rebelled every step of the way. My experience, in my youth, was not about faith or religion, so I grew to hate anything and everything related to God and the Church. Most men and women in prison have this same type of "Family" and religious experience to relate to. The word "Family" is more of a curse or burden. Christians who have had a better "Family" life cannot relate to what the church experience of people in prisons was or even continues to be. For more than a quarter of a century, I have now been locked up and on Death Row. You won't hear me tell you I'm innocent. I hated my life so much that I knew that I wouldn't live to see 30 years old when on the streets. But God had other plans. For 15 years of my prison life I continued to hate everything and everyone. People have to unlearn sometimes before they can begin to learn. When it comes to God and Church, I associated both to my "Family". God the Father - of course, I could only see as I had seen my earthly Father, and the "Church" as my earthly 'Family". Both of which had messed me up. So how could I trust either? God is -- thankfully -- patient with us. As written in 2 Peter 3:9 “The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some count slackness, but is long suffering (patient) towards us. NOT willing that ANY should perish but that ALL should come to repentance.” This "ALL should come to repentance", does not exclude even the most evil person you can think of. Jesus died on that cross for my sins, for your sins and even Hitler's sins. But we must turn to Him. I just was not willing to do this until about ten years ago. Faith comes hard for those who have trouble trusting anything or anyone, because faith is about trusting in that which you cannot see. Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith (trust) is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen". Or Romans 8:24 "For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees?” Though in prison life is hard, it is easier in here for me and a lot less frightening. That probably sounds odd to someone reading this. But what you need to realize is that I do not know much about the world outside these prison walls. I have spent more than half my life in solitary confinement. The world I live in scares you because you don't know it. You may see something on TV or in the movies, or read about it. That's how I see the world you live in also. After many years, I am what is known as institutionalized. I depend on others to bring my food. I have learned that I must trust those other inmates or guards whose job it is to prepare and serve my food, I hope no one spits in it or does worse to it. Like you at a restaurant, it's better to be nice to those who serve. Faith in prison is not about religion, it is about who is protecting your back or whose you are watching. Gossip on the streets in your world, in your church, in your "Families", can be harmful, but in prison, it can get someone killed. You come into this world, if you're smart, not trusting even your own flesh and blood, because you never know what they might need to do to save themselves. Respect is earned by one's deeds, how he/she reacts in different situations. This is the attitude of many prisoners towards Christians on the streets also. Because of a bad experience with religion and church members, that is then transferred to every single person of religion. I too went through this. Christians talk a good game, but fall short when that situation comes up to prove even the smallest loyalty - to have the inmates back (so to speak). A Christian inmate WILL test a free-person Christian. I have done it myself, I won’t lie! And yes, it will most likely be over money. Why money? It’s about money because everything that inmate has ever seen or heard of that deals with church out there has always revolved around money. As a kid, I went to church from age five to sixteen and never missed a Sunday school, church service or prayer meeting. And we lived 20 miles away. Every time we went there was someone standing there with their hand out for the Tithe or whatever. My Dad was a Deacon so his son had to be an example, an extension of him if you will. I hated that! So the inmate Christian will test the free Christians. When Jesus told the rich young ruler as in Luke 18:18-30 “Sell all that you have and distribute it to the poor, and you will have treasure in Heaven; and come, follow ME”, was Jesus not checking for loyalty? Jesus even told this young man, “You still lack one thing”. Did Jesus want this young man to be destitute? Of course not! That wasn’t the point at all. The young man thought so much of himself, and the things he had acquired, Jesus was pointing out these were more important to the young man than that which thought he was seeking, eternal life. I am in prison on Death Row for the kidnapping and murder of a man who wanted to have sex with a 14 year old boy. Murder is one of the many things Christians for some reason think that God cannot possibly forgive. They believe the scriptures of the Old Testament call for them to put me or anyone else to death for this “crime”. For 15 years, I thought to hurt in any way possible other Death Row inmates who have harmed and/or murdered a woman or child. What a hypocrite I was! Does God see one person’s life of more value than another? Or is it that we want to think so out of our own arrogance? How would my execution — death - be any different than anyone else’s on Death Row — or anywhere else? Is death justified? Will you, not having committed murder, be more justified by the blood of Jesus than I will? It was Simon Peter, to whose statement Jesus said, “Upon this rock (faith) I will build my church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it.” (Matthew 16:18) Many people want to think it was Peter himself He meant that would never fail (rather than the rock/faith), but Peter actually soon crumbled: he denied knowing Jesus not once or twice, but three times. Yet, after His resurrection, Jesus asked them to go tell His disciples and mentions Peter by name. In John 21, Jesus restores Peter’s faith and strengthens it. As Paul says in Romans 10:17 “So faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God’. Even two thousand years later it is true: “I was in prison and you came to me” (Matthew 25:31-46) - be a missionary and never leave your home to do it. The great commission is to “Go into all the world and preach the gospel.” (Mark 16:15) This is given to all who call themselves by His name, His followers. Christian! Even those IN prison have this same commission to those inside and out as Paul gives example! Steven James Arizona, USA |
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